Farmboy Turned Metro?
So I like to brush my teeth, shower, wear cologne, use deodorant, keep my hair cut and styled, trim excess hair from nose, ears, face and brows daily. As I grow older, some of those things are a much larger chore than they used to be. So what? Does that make me metro?? My boys seem to think so.
So I don't mind shopping, and I've helped women pick out shoes and outfits (and done a great job doing so, if I do say so myself). I like nice clothes and shoes, and want things to match. So I may have more shoes than the typical guy does...so what? I love to cook too...lots of guys like to cook, right?? Does that make me metro? I don't think so!
I was raised on a farm, as I've said before. Not just a farm, a hog farm. Yep, that's right, pigs. Lots of pigs. Around 1,000 pigs at a time. Do you know what goes with the pig territory? Lots of feed. We ground our own feed for our persnickety and spoiled pigs. At times it seemed like they got more attention than the Dougherty boys. We usually had around 12 mama pigs having babies at any given moment, which meant we had to play "pig ob/gyn" for those preggo pigs. They were my original high maintenance females! The bottom line was, when you have lots of pigs, and lots of feed, you produce lots of...well, to put it nicely, lots of pig poo. If you've ever had the misfortune of passing a pig farm while driving in the country, you understand what that means. Lots of unbelievable stank! It seemed like there was no number of showers, not enough soap, shampoo, or cologne that would completely remove the attachment of those nasty stink molecules from your body. It put a huge damper on the social life, let me tell you.
We also raised wheat. We didn't have the luxury of tractors with cabs when we were working the fields. Kansas has some pretty substantial heat, so that meant no air conditioning and the full bore of truckloads of dust being kicked up covering you. I probably inhaled enough dirt while driving tractors and working fields, I could replace a layer of topsoil in the average yard. That's not to mention the myriad of other tasks that kept you looking and smelling nasty.
Who could blame a guy for wanting a little less of that? I didn't mind the work so much, it was some of those aromas that came along with it that I wanted to eliminate. As I left the farm, my tastes changed a bit. I went from wearing jeans, t-shirts, and some form of cap 99% of the time to different fashions. As time marched on, I refined my tastes a bit and sought out some of the finer things in life. Before you cast judgement, you have to realize that it doesn't take much to improve upon my history. Does that make me metro? I don't think so.
Let's examine this a little further. The new Merriam Webster on the net is Wiki...if you want to know anything you Google it, or Wiki it. Wiki says this about metro men:
The typical metrosexual is a young man with money to spend, living in or within easy reach of a metropolis — because that’s where all the best shops, clubs, gyms and hairdressers are.
Breaking it down: I'm old, not much money to spend, I DO live near a metropolis. I don't mind shopping, I like to go to a club now and again, I go to the gym, and my daughter-in-law cuts my hair (and does an excellent job). Besides all that, I like NASCAR! I've even been to some races. Metro? not by definition! Hopefully my sons will read my post and the whole teasing thing will be put to rest. The holidays are coming, and the level of crap getting thrown Daddio's way may be reduced dramatically. I seriously doubt it, but a guy can hope, right?
By the way...you ought to see the awesome pea coat I got the other day! It's sweet! FG
So I don't mind shopping, and I've helped women pick out shoes and outfits (and done a great job doing so, if I do say so myself). I like nice clothes and shoes, and want things to match. So I may have more shoes than the typical guy does...so what? I love to cook too...lots of guys like to cook, right?? Does that make me metro? I don't think so!
I was raised on a farm, as I've said before. Not just a farm, a hog farm. Yep, that's right, pigs. Lots of pigs. Around 1,000 pigs at a time. Do you know what goes with the pig territory? Lots of feed. We ground our own feed for our persnickety and spoiled pigs. At times it seemed like they got more attention than the Dougherty boys. We usually had around 12 mama pigs having babies at any given moment, which meant we had to play "pig ob/gyn" for those preggo pigs. They were my original high maintenance females! The bottom line was, when you have lots of pigs, and lots of feed, you produce lots of...well, to put it nicely, lots of pig poo. If you've ever had the misfortune of passing a pig farm while driving in the country, you understand what that means. Lots of unbelievable stank! It seemed like there was no number of showers, not enough soap, shampoo, or cologne that would completely remove the attachment of those nasty stink molecules from your body. It put a huge damper on the social life, let me tell you.
We also raised wheat. We didn't have the luxury of tractors with cabs when we were working the fields. Kansas has some pretty substantial heat, so that meant no air conditioning and the full bore of truckloads of dust being kicked up covering you. I probably inhaled enough dirt while driving tractors and working fields, I could replace a layer of topsoil in the average yard. That's not to mention the myriad of other tasks that kept you looking and smelling nasty.
Who could blame a guy for wanting a little less of that? I didn't mind the work so much, it was some of those aromas that came along with it that I wanted to eliminate. As I left the farm, my tastes changed a bit. I went from wearing jeans, t-shirts, and some form of cap 99% of the time to different fashions. As time marched on, I refined my tastes a bit and sought out some of the finer things in life. Before you cast judgement, you have to realize that it doesn't take much to improve upon my history. Does that make me metro? I don't think so.
Let's examine this a little further. The new Merriam Webster on the net is Wiki...if you want to know anything you Google it, or Wiki it. Wiki says this about metro men:
The typical metrosexual is a young man with money to spend, living in or within easy reach of a metropolis — because that’s where all the best shops, clubs, gyms and hairdressers are.
Breaking it down: I'm old, not much money to spend, I DO live near a metropolis. I don't mind shopping, I like to go to a club now and again, I go to the gym, and my daughter-in-law cuts my hair (and does an excellent job). Besides all that, I like NASCAR! I've even been to some races. Metro? not by definition! Hopefully my sons will read my post and the whole teasing thing will be put to rest. The holidays are coming, and the level of crap getting thrown Daddio's way may be reduced dramatically. I seriously doubt it, but a guy can hope, right?
By the way...you ought to see the awesome pea coat I got the other day! It's sweet! FG
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